It's My 103 Dilemmas All Over Again



Eight months. I thought everything's changed. I had life of my own since and accepted that things will never be the same ever again. I loved the life I lived without him inside my conciousness. It was almost perfect. I felt as if I can breathe the air of contentment. I fell in love with another guy which I can say is true love. I don t know if it's the same thing I felt for JC before, but at least it made me get what I never got when I was trying to win his heart.


I know it's a shame to say that I'm falling for JC again. Or did I ever lost that feeling I had? I know I had been having so much fun with another guy while I was in the process of forgetting him, but did I forgot about him? Did I let the feelings go? The only thing I am certain about is that I tried.


I hate to see him with those cuts on his wrist. Worse, I hate the reason for those wounds. Rhein promised me she's going to take care of JC. But she broke her promise. Now, JC is in his saddest and I hate to see him cry. His tears crushes my heart. I don't want to talk to him for I know I'll start crying with him if he do. And if I do that, I know he'll ask.


I know I still have the shitty feeling for JC. But I'm not going to tell to anyone. I don't want the world to know I'm dying inside because of JC's tears and wounds, because I feel for him. It's a shame if I'm going to wear my mask off and tell theworld I still love JC, because I know the world won't understand.

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